A Scary Thought
March 13th, 2007Scott Adams, best known as the author of Dilbert, posted an account of an exasperating plane journey he had recently, on the Dilbert blog today:
Yesterday I was flying across the country. My biggest fear when flying isn’t that the jet might crash; it’s that I might end up sitting next to the World’s Most Annoying Man for five hours. Theoretically, such a person exists. I mean, SOMEONE has to be the most annoying man in the world. And there’s a good chance that he flies. After yesterday, I’m reasonably sure that he looks like Mr. Clean on crack, and he was sitting next to me in seat 3D.
As you know, when people use headphones, they talk too loudly because they can’t hear themselves. I learned that this phenomenon extends to nasal sounds in the sniff-snort category. Mr. Clean on crack was rocking out to his iPod and sniff-snorting so loudly every few seconds that the flight crew kept looking out the window to see if a pterodactyl was attacking the fuselage.
Oh, I’m just getting started…
The complete essay is humorous in a way only Adams can be, but it has also managed to instill a deep fear in my mind. After all, the 0.056547619-fortnight-long plane ride(s) I shall be experiencing (each way) a month from now - I’m going back home for a vacation - are going to be much longer than what Adams has had to endure in a single sitting. The excruciation that results from restricted motion over such long periods of time is simply exponential, in a way that can not be described to someone who has not experienced anything beyond a domestic flight. I’ll be preparing for the onset of boredom with books, music, and the anticipation of a good in-flight movie selection, but nothing can prepare you to handle the misfortune of having the World’s Most Annoying Man by your side. Please include me in your prayers.
